This past Valentine’s Day, I got a lot of text messages from friends who were not too impressed with how their significant other expressed their LOVE. Some I understood, some were just petty. But don’t fear, guys. You have a chance to redeem yourself in just a few weeks. So let’s do better this Mother’s Day, shall we fellas? This year Mother’s Day falls on Sunday, May 8th. I personally am not very big on gifts- my love language is Acts of Service. My idea of a perfect Mother’s Day is where I don’t have to drag myself out of bed too early and don’t have to life a finger. Oh, and a foot rub. DONE.
I’m not the flowers and candy girl, not the jewelry girl, nor am I the “take me to dinner on a holiday girl” (because shoot me now, the lines). Aside to my husband: I do need to explain here that I very much am up for you to take me to dinner. I love to eat. I love it so much that I don’t want to wait an hour to sit and then 45 minutes to get my food because I get hangry with the quickness. You know this about me. Don’t use my words against me.
But I digress. When I DO give gifts, I try to go the practical route, something that is functional, that will be used by the person. However, if I am receiving SOMETHING, I prefer it to be an experience. Big or small, something that has thought behind it will go a long way with me.
Guys: Here are 5 ideas for Mother’s Day gifts she will never forget.
#1: Skip the card, write a letter.
Like a FOR REAL letter in your handwriting. With your feelings and stuff. Bonus points if it’s 2 pages or more. We know this is hard, uncomfortable even- but hey; I tell my kids all the time that outside your comfort zone is where the magic happens. In this case, there will be magic, if you know what I mean. If you run out of words, take a page from Big in Sex And The City and just start writing the Love Letters of Great Men. You gotta trust me on this.
#2 Skip the flowers, build her a garden.
Listen, I’ve she’s been saying she wants to plant flowers and build a garden for the last 3 years. You bought her that Gardening for Dummies book for Christmas and she threw it at you and no magic happened for a long time. Even if it’s just planting a few of her favorite flowers, get her something that can grow as a reminder of how your love has grown for her over the years. (I impressed myself there, you better put that in the letter). On second thought, only put that in the letter if you can commit to making sure it doesn’t die, because the next “disagreement”, I am she’s going to use that against you.
#3 Get her a house cleaner.
If you’re sitting there thinking “Why would I hire someone to do her job” you are doing this wrong and that’s not how this works. You know what gets in the way of us actually getting to be a Mom? All the things, particularly cleaning. It’s a necessary evil, but I guarantee you she’d rather be playing having a tea party with her princess, playing video games or throwing a ball with her boys…than cleaning up the tea party and the snacks. You know how it feels when you walk in to a clean house (even if you don’t just nod your head and pretend)? She wants to experience that too. Even better if you can both experience it together. Even if it’s just for one month, I promise you- Momma will be happy. Happy wife, Happy Life and all that.
#4 Put Her In Time Out.
Now this could go lots of ways, but the way I’m talking about is you handing her the keys and putting her in the car with a list with what time she needs to be at certain places. Have her friends (the ones she actually likes, not the ones that make her stabby whenever they spend time together) meet her there. Now, if your wife is like me…don’t do this ON Mother’s Day, do it the Saturday before. We don’t want to spend that day away from you or the kids. Make brunch reservations, spa appointments, send her to pick up a dress that you’ve already bought for her at a boutique and end with dinner with her girls. Text her sweet little sentiments and pictures every few hours with strict orders NOT to text you back (this just let’s her know that you are, in fact, handling things at home like the awesome Dad you are). Give her a Day where she’s just “HER”, instead of the many roles that she handles #likeaboss.
#5 Plan a Date Night, with NO involvement from her.
That means you contact the sitter, you make the reservations, you decide where you’ll dine, you decide on an activity (please, NO. Not a movie.) YOU. YOU. YOU. This is something high on every woman’s wish list. I was mad at my husband for a whole year because he’d call me at 4pm on Friday night and ask if I wanted to go on a date. I’d ask “Did you get a sitter?” and he’d say something along the lines of “Ummm.. I thought… that’s what you do?” and then I stopped listening and vowed to never go on a date with him again until he would plan it himself. That backfired badly. We just didn’t go on dates. And then I was mad because I wanted him to WANT to take me out and plan a date (newsflash: this is how women think. It’s all very logical). I don’t even remember how the travesty ended, I probably said something like “FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THINGS HOLY WILL YOU TAKE ME TO A MOVIE?” and then he said “Yeah, did you call the sitter?” and I caved and said yes because MEN.
Don’t be like him. Learn from his mistakes. Plan the date.
Do any of these things and she’ll be posting how much she loves her man on Facebook faster than you can MAKE the magic happen. Take that how you want.
Whatever you do, make it an experience!